Walking on fire

Why in the world would anyone want to walk on fire? In fact many ask "What the hell are you thinking? That is crazy!". In fact, that is the response I got from almost everyone I told that I wanted to and was going to walk on fire.  Others, well let's just say they were skeptical at best. Not many believers out there these days I guess.

In fact, you might be saying the same or close to the same thing.  WTH are you thinking?

What I was thinking was what a rush, what an accomplishment, and what a game-changer.  I tell clients to challenge their beliefs, try new things to get better results.  Take action on the things that cause them to hold back.  Fears they have, ideas that prevent them from moving into greatness. My job as a business coach is to help people face and overcome those limiting beliefs that are holding them back.

So what does this have to do with walking on fire?  Here it is... I am so scared of fire it isn't funny.  As a young boy, I had a scary experience with fire.  I was trying to help my dad light the hot water heater in the basement. (gas fed). At 10 years old I had yet to understand how gas and flames work, I just knew that dad couldn't fit in the crawlspace to relight the heater and I wanted to help.  "I can do it Dad, I can fit, let me!" I exclaimed.  So he let me and told me to turn the lever to pilot light and then take this big long  (lit) match and place it on the pilot light. After a few failed attempts to light the pilot frustration set in and my 10-year-old brain said, "just turn up the gas, that should help" so I turned the lever up to on and proceeded to light the heater.

Well, you can imagine the result, gas flooded the small area under the heater and as soon as I moved the lit match close... WOOOOOOM!!!  Flames shot out and flashed back and burned all of my eyelashes, brows, and some of the hair on my head off, and flash burned my face and neck.  Thankfully my reaction was to shut my eyes and my sight was unaffected.  Why do I tell you this?  Because I was deathly afraid of fire after that.  I had a fascination but overwhelming fear of fire.

What are you afraid of?   What scares the shit out of you?  Bugs, Spiders, water, speaking in public? Whatever it is the ONLY way to overcome or get past that fear is to do it.  Bottom line, you have to face your fear and do it anyway!  It is mind over the issue and a focus on the goal. Knowing what you want is critical when you are setting out to accomplish something. 

You must catch that bug, kill that spider (not that I’m about killing anything), jump in the water, get up in front of the group and share that idea or speech. Take that chance, make something happen.  Do it NOW!!!  The first commandment of Coach Rick’s 12 Common Sense Commandments for Success. That leads to rule number two,  If not now… WHEN?

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is the founder of the Peak Performance Group, a leadership, Sales and team development company.  He is also the author of Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as an expert on designing strategies for companies. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or info@MyPotentialPLus.com

 

 

An Attitude of Gratitude

“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and to give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.”   Ralph Waldo Emerson

In other words, for your wellness and highest good, and for the good of all, start and end each day with a grateful heart. It makes such a difference in raising your energy level, along with that of the person or thing you are thankful for. It truly brings blessings to the world.

A great gratitude “tool” is keeping a gratitude journal. Just before going to sleep, write, say three things or events you are grateful for that day. Then while you sleep, your subconscious and your brain will be focusing on those positive thoughts, rather than negative ones. When you wake up in the morning, probably after a good night’s sleep, thanks to your gratitude, thank your bed for having provided you with a cosy resting place for the night, and whatever else you would like to give thanks to, so as to start your day in the positive energy of gratitude.

Everything in this world is comprised of energy and you receive according to the frequency you transmit. So, when you are grateful, you create opportunities for things to come your way for which you can be grateful. Studies have shown that people who adopt an attitude of gratitude tend to be happier and healthier. In turn, happier and healthier people are attracted into your life, with whom you have deeper relationships.

There are so many things to be thankful for, and while you are focusing on these things you mind will not allow you to look for the things that you feel like you may be lacking. Negative thoughts withdraw to the background and eventually don’t come up on your radar.

This is encouraging when considering the end of year holiday season. At this time, we see much beauty and evidence of things for which to be grateful. However, the holiday can be stressful, exhausting and lonely for many people. For those who exercise gratitude on a regular basis, it can be a positive period.

We’ve seen how gratitude makes you happier and healthier, which in turn affects the central nervous system. As a result, you become more peaceful, reacting less to situations and people. You get on better with others, having closer and deeper relationships. It is evident how this would lead to a more pleasurable end of year holiday.

To conclude, let’s consider the words of John F. Kennedy:

"As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words but to live by them." This is a positive mantra for not only the holiday season but all year long.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is the founder of the Peak Performance Group, a leadership and team development company.  He is also the author of Roll Up Your Sleeves & Get To Work.  He helps people design a life strategy for success. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or Rick@MyPotentialPlus.com

The Secret To Everything

The secret to everything!

Now that the holidays are gone, it’s a good time to look back, see all the things we can be thankful for and focus on the meaning of giving thanks and how it can affect your life. It is a simple word that can change your day in an instant. It can make your day better when you hear it from the lady you help to carry her grocery bags, or when you say it with a smile as someone holds a door for you.

This feeling is a part of human nature, and it is so common that it is often simply ignored. It can be said mechanically without even thinking about its importance. However, a thank you should never be said mechanically, but it should be said from the heart. In the same way, it should not be taken for granted, something that you know should be said, but as something that has been given with the purest intentions. This is a powerful feeling that should be taken into account many times during your everyday life.

Besides the everyday life, a thank you is often said at the workplace. It has the purpose to help employees bond and to help employers express their gratitude. However, there are many companies where people do not understand the true meaning of a real thank you, and therefore many problems start to appear. These companies forget the importance of these two simple words. This begins a slow decline in motivation and employee satisfaction. Turning this around can happen with an acceptance of this simple gesture.  This way they will have more chances to stand out from the competition and ultimately find success. After all, employees need to work in a peaceful environment where they can reach their full potential.

If you own a company, you should try this as soon as possible. You will see that you can easily change the external perception about the workplace you have to offer. An honest thank you causes zero harm, but it will show appreciation and help you motivate your employees. This, in turn, provides an environment where they can perform a better quality job. The most effective way is to apply the power of example. This means that you will have to express your gratitude each time it is warranted or whenever you feel that it is necessary. This, in turn, people will feel appreciated and that their work makes a difference, which keeps them motivated and they will put more into the job. As you can see, this does not require much time or effort, and it drives the organization to become more successful.

Once a person hears a thank you said from the heart, he/she will have a different view regarding the world. After all, people appreciate when someone recognizes their effort. There are many who believe that money represents the gratitude of a company, but this is not true. Money does not have anything in common with the deep emotions transmitted with the help of a true thank you said from the heart. Who will you thank today?

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach, the author of Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as an expert on developing leaders and designing strategy for companies. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or rick@MyPotentialPlus.com  www.MyPotentialPlus.com 

The BALD TRUTH - Work/Life balance is B*LLSH*!

There’s been a lot of talk and discussion over the past few decades about the work life balance, and today we have companies that provide training in this area and basically teach us a lot of stuff that sounds great but has little to do with reality. So, are we helpless? Is there any way we can achieve a perfect work life balance, perform in our careers and still manage to spend time with our family? Oh, but there is. Of course, at first the “I don’t know what to do” kicks in and we find ourselves trapped in between what we must do, what we have to and what we actually want to do.

Of course, the most important thing is how you approach the situation, how you position yourself in relationship to it and afterwards what you do about it. There’s this powerful saying I agree with completely that says “No man is trapped except in his own mind”. So let’s set things straight and get you out of this mess.

First of all, you need to take a few steps back and look at it from up above, because when work life balance is messed up, you’ve gotten yourself in a little too many details. What is your dream? What do you want to do with your life? What is your true, deep inside calling? This is the starting point and you need to take some time to answer it.

Don’t worry, it will come to you and you will know. Then do a right and rigorous self-assessment of yourself.  What is really important to you? What are the things in your life you couldn’t do without? What are your values? What are the guidelines you have set for your life? Take some time to think about what truly matters for yourself. After you’ve got your answers about your dream, your calling, and your truest values, it’s time to look at your job. Are we talking about the right job fit here? They say that one who loves his work will not work a single day in his life.

Are you that one? Be honest to yourself and at the same time take your time. It’s the perfect time to slow down just a notch, now that things are beginning to look more clear and everything is more obvious and out there. Now it’s time for the right focus to kick in. Start to focus on the things that matter, the things you love to do, focus on your dream, focus on your inner peace and happiness. In the end, these are the things that matter the most.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach, the author of Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as an expert on developing leaders and designing strategy for companies. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or   Rick@CoachRickKolster.com 

www.CoachRickKolster.com

The BALD TRUTH - Thank You From the Heart

“Thank you” from the heart

Now that Thanksgiving is gone, it’s a good time to focus on the meaning of giving thanks and how it can affect your life. It is a simple word that can change your day in an instant. It can make your day better when you hear it from the lady you help to carry her grocery bags, or when you say it with a smile as someone holds a door for you.

This feeling is a part of human nature, and it is so common that it is often simply ignored. It can be said mechanically without even thinking about its importance. However, a thank you should never be said mechanically, but it should be said from the heart. In the same way, it should not be taken for granted, something that you know should be said, but as something that has been given with the purest intentions. This is a powerful feeling that should be taken into account many times during your everyday life.

Besides the everyday life, a thank you is often said at the work place. It has the purpose to help employees bond and to help employers express their gratitude. However, there are many companies where people do not understand the true meaning of a real thank you, and therefore many problems start to appear. These companies forget the importance of these two simple words. This begins a slow decline in motivation and employee satisfaction. Turning this around can happen with a acceptance of this simple gesture.  This way they will have more chances to stand out from the competition and ultimately find success. After all, employees need to work in a peaceful environment where they can reach their full potential.

If you own a company, you should try this as soon as possible. You will see that you can easily change the external perception about the work place you have to offer. An honest thank you  causes zero harm, but it will show appreciation and help you motivate your employees. This in turn provides an environment where they can perform a better quality job. The most effective way is to apply the power of example. This means that you will have to express your gratitude each time it is warranted or whenever you feel that it is necessary. This in turn people will feel appreciated and that their work makes a difference, which keeps them motivated and they will put more into the job. As you can see, this does not require much time or effort, and it drives the organization to become more successful.

Once a person hears a thank you, said from the heart, he/she will have a different view regarding the world. After all, people appreciate when someone recognizes their effort. There are many who believe that money represents the gratitude of a company, but this is not true. Money does not have anything in common with the deep emotions transmitted with the help of a true thank you said from the heart. 

Who will you thank today?

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach, the author of Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as an expert on developing leaders and designing strategy for companies. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or   Rick@CoachRickKolster.com 

www.CoachRickKolster.com 

The BALD TRUTH - Planing to fail? Your call!

Planning to fail.  Your call.

We talked about the three killers of a business.  Number one is lack of cash flow.  Number two is poor leadership and now let’s talk about number three:  LACK OF A STRATEGIC PLAN

Strategic Planning

People don’t plan to fail, they fail to plan.

Businesses succeed and fail for many different reasons. It might be your commitment to getting out there every day, a new product or service, great marketing, consumer demand and maybe even luck are all a part of the reasons.  All of these contribute to whether a business makes it or fails.  Knowing your vision and mission (why) and designing your strategies to accomplish them (how) are both a part of the strategic plan.

Why should you have a strategic plan?  Here is the reason. Without a plan you will be flying without a rudder and trying anything that is presented to you to make your business grow. As a business owner you will be bombarded with marketing and sales ideas from every conceivable direction. Each one touting it is the best way to grow your business.  To that I say BS!

Do they even understand your business?  Do they know your WHY? Probably NOT! So why would you allow they to tell you how to run your business yet business owners do it every day. Having a strategic plan will give you direction and allow you to make decisions about your business that are in sync with your vision.

What is the process of strategic planning?  It looks simple yet takes time to create.  The components are:

1.    Vison

a.    Why are you in business?  This is your big picture of your potential as a business. This defines the purpose of the company and the plan. It might be called the “quest” of your company. What is your company Why? Do you know it?

2.    Values:

a.    These are foundational to how you will make decisions.  They lay to ethical ground work for your company and its future. This will define the basic beliefs your company, or what your company is committed to. Does your company have clearly defined values?

3.    Mission

a.    A mission statement transforms the vision into specific actions that are necessary to achieve the vision. The mission statement defines and says what you want to achieve in a specific time frame. This gives direction to all in your company and keeps them on track.

4.    Critical Success Factors

a.    These are the meat and potatoes of the plan.  The tactical areas that must be addressed to be successful. They are broad areas such as: Cash flow, marketing, new product development, product quality, customer service. The list can be long. What are your top 3-5 areas that need to be addressed?

5.    Goals

a.    Each area that you come up with will have to have specific measurable goals. This gets you into action.

The plan will also include market research, a SLOT analysis, Sales plan and financial budgets.  Bottom line, if you want to assure your business will have a better chance to grow and prosper.  Design a plan for the future. Call us today.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach, the author of Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as an expert on developing leaders and designing strategy for companies. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or   Rick@CoachRickKolster.com 

www.CoachRickKolster.com 

The BALD TRUTH - Are you using protection?

Every day businesses and business owners are susceptible to many attacks and challenges that could devastate their hard work and livelihood.  Are you one of those businesses or owners? A survey by Forbes Magazine showed some interesting facts:  Over 500,000 new businesses are started each month. Almost 40% of these small businesses never make it to their second anniversary. Yet another 55% never make it past 5 years. Only about 1/3^rd make it to 10 years. Why?

Three main killers of a businesses

1.    Lack of cash flow

2.    Poor leadership and customer service

3.    Lack of a strategic plan

Over the next few months I will address each of these three major challenges that business leaders fail to protect themselves from and will kill a business.

Lack of Cash flow.

Starting a new venture takes a bunch of things, one of which is a basic knowledge of business and how to sell your product or service.  Over the past 11 years I have been working with clients to create sustainable and profitable businesses I have found that this is the thing that will kill a business.  So you are probably asking yourself, how this relates to the 3 killers of a business.

Bottom line, no sales, no cash flow, no cash flow, no business. Simple but true.  So often a client has made the decision to step out, start a business based on their technical expertise and has yet to learn how to sell what they do. They also start without enough capital in reserve.  Result.  FAIL!  It has been said and I believe “that nothing happens until a sale is made”.  If no one is selling, I can guarantee tis, no one is buying. 

 

Ok how does lack of cash flow kill a business?  I have learned that cash flow is king and with a consistent flow of cash into a business there is hope. Now if it is a negative cash flow, there is a challenge for sure. When I opened my first restaurant in 1981 we did everything on a shoestring and were literally taking from Peter to pay Paul. What does that mean? What it means is we used cash flow to pay immediate critical bills (electric and staff) while others  (beer and food vendors) we used float time to let our cash reserves replenish to take care of other these less critical expenses. My partner and I became known as the kings of the float.

We would pack the bar out on Thursday Friday and Saturday with happy hour and late night biz.   What that means is we would always write checks late on Friday to the beer and food vendors knowing they would wait until Monday to deposit, giving us three days to use the cash flow and float to keep us going.  Now this just was used as a strategy as we started, once we established the business and we began to see positive cash flow, things smoothed out.  Still I learned that cash flow is king.

So to protect your business, focus first on your cash flow and protect it like a chastity belt protects a virgin. But that's something for another time.  Until next month protect your business and remember cash flow is king.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach, the author of Selling for Geniuses and Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as a motivational speaker on personal growth. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or Rick@CoachRickKolster.com www.CoachRickKolster.com

The BALD TRUTH - 18 ways you are making your life harder

"Life is not complex.  We are complex.  Life is simple, and the simple thing is the right thing.”
―Oscar Wilde

When we were young life was easier, right?  I know sometimes it seems that way.  But the truth is life still is easy.  It always will be.  The only difference is we’re older, and the older we get, the harder we make things for ourselves.

You see, when we were young we saw the world through simple, hopeful eyes.  We knew what we wanted and we had no biases or concealed agendas.  We liked people who smiled.  We avoided people who frowned.  We ate when we were hungry, drank when we were thirsty, and slept when we were tired.

As we grew older our minds became gradually disillusioned by negative external influences.  At some point we began to hesitate and question our instincts.  When a new obstacle or growing pain arose, we stumbled and fell down.  This happened several times.  Eventually we decided we didn’t want to fall again, but rather than solving the problem that caused us to fall, we avoided it all together.

As a result, we ate comfort food and drank alcohol to numb our wounds and fill our voids.  We worked late nights on purpose to avoid unresolved conflicts at home.  We started holding grudges, playing mind games, and subtly deceiving others and ourselves to get ahead.  And when it didn’t work out, we lived above our means, used lies to cover up lies, and ate and drank some more just to make ourselves feel better again.

Over the course of time, we made our lives harder and harder, and we started losing touch with who we really are and what we really need.

If you’re nodding your head, here are some ways you’re likely making your life harder than it has to be, and some ideas on simplifying things:

1. You look to everyone else for the answers only you can give yourself. – For much of our lives – especially at the beginning – we get told what do, how to think, what looks good, what “success” is, etc.  You don’t have to buy into any of it anymore.  Feel free to peel back the layers.  Think for yourself.  Listen to your Self.  Break the mold.  When you stop doing what everybody else wants you to do and start following your own intuition, you will find exactly what you are looking for.

2. You let others make you feel guilty for living your life. – As long as you’re not hurting anyone else, keep living your life YOUR way.  Sometimes we get lost in trying to live for someone else, trying to meet their expectations, and doing things just to impress them.  Take a moment and think about it.  Are you doing things because you truly believe in them?  Remember your own goals.  Live, do and love so that you are happy, because when it comes down to it, relationships can end in an instant, but you will live with yourself for the rest of your life.

3. You allow toxic people to get the best of you. – You don’t ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life.  It doesn’t matter whether someone is a relative, romantic interest, colleague, childhood friend or a new acquaintance.  You don’t have to make room for people who cause you pain or make you feel small.  It’s one thing if a person owns up to their behavior and makes an effort to change.  But if a person disregards your feelings, ignores your boundaries and continues to treat you in a harmful way, they need to go.  (Read Toxic People.)

4. You are part of the drama circle. – How would your life be different if you walked away from drama, gossip and verbal defamation?  Let today be the day you speak only about the good you know of other people and encourage others to do the same.  Those that refuse to support you CAN be ignored by you.  It’s as simple as that.  Incredible things happen when you distance yourself from negativity and those who create it.  Don’t get caught up in drama.  Just walk on by.

5. You assign negative intent to other people’s actions. – Another driver cut you off in traffic.  Your friend never texted you back.  Your colleague went to lunch without you.  Everyone can find a reason to be offended on a daily basis.  So what caused you to be offended?  You assigned negative intent to these otherwise innocent actions.  You took it as a personal insult – a slap in the face.  Don’t do this to yourself.  Don’t take things personally.  Don’t assign negative intent to the unintentional actions of others.  Let today be the day you look for the good in everyone you meet.

6. You are too worried that people will steal what you have. – Let this be your wake-up call, especially if you’re an artist, writer, entrepreneur or creative type: There is always more to be gained from sharing knowledge than from hoarding it.  Don’t worry about people stealing your work; worry about the moment they stop.  Be honest, helpful and undeniably good at what you do.  No clever marketing scheme, social media buzzword, or competitor can be a substitute for that, ever.  Whenever people want what you have, regardless of the circumstances, you’re doing it right.

7. You’re trying to compete with everyone else. – If you compete with everyone else, you will become bitter.  If you compete with a previous version of yourself, you will become better.  It’s as simple as that.

8. You have been too much of a taker. – One way to deal with stress and loss is to immerse yourself in doing good for others.  Volunteer.  Get involved in life.  It doesn’t even have to be a big, structured event.  Say a kind word.  Encourage someone nearby.  Pay a visit to someone who is alone.  Get away from your self-preoccupation for a while.  When it comes down to it, there are two types of people in this world.  There are givers and there are takers.  Givers are happy.  Takers are still unhappily wondering what’s in it for them.

9. You focus on popularity over effectiveness. – Seek respect, not attention.  It lasts longer and it’s far more useful in the end.  Do things and build things that make a lasting difference.  And above all, never confuse popularity with effectiveness.  Being popular means you’re liked for a while.  Being effective means you’ve made a difference.

10. You keep cutting corners and taking the easy way out. – Do what is right, not what is easy.  And do the right thing even if no one else will ever know.  Why?  Because YOU will know.

11. You focus on every point in time other than now. – You can’t change yesterday, but you can ruin today by worrying about tomorrow.  Be present.  Tomorrow will reveal itself exactly as it should, just as yesterday already has.

12. You are stuck on your mistakes. – It’s important that we forgive ourselves for making mistakes.  We need to learn from our errors and move forward.  Make a pact with yourself today to not be defined by your past.  Sometimes the greatest thing to come out of all your hard work isn’t what you get for it, but what you learn from it.  A happy, successful life, after all, is not a life absent of problems, but one that’s been able to rise above them.  (Angel and I discuss this in detail in the “Adversity” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.)

13. You have an “all or nothing” mentality. – There’s no such thing as perfect success, just as there’s no such thing as perfect failure.  This is why labeling things in extremes – all or nothing – success or failure – is an exercise in futility.  What does exist, however, is a continuous series of imperfect moments filled with infinite possibilities and opportunities.  Appreciate the grey area between the extremes – the journey – the experiences.  And above all, never let success get to your head or failure get to your heart.

14. You expect life to always be happy. – The world can be a difficult place.  You may experience suffering, heartbreak and loss.  These circumstances can take a toll on your happiness, but do not lose hope.  Think about the Yin and Yang in Chinese philosophy, which states that opposite forces are often interconnected.  In suffering, you can find great strength, in heartbreak you can find resilience, and in loss you can find a renewed appreciation for life.  Life is always Yin and Yang.  Opposites are interdependent and interconnected.  You can’t completely shield yourself from sadness without also shielding yourself from happiness.

15. You keep thinking about worst-case scenarios. - Sometimes your mind unnecessarily wrestles with events that aren’t even remotely likely.  Your sore throat is life threatening.  Your lost driver’s license fell into the hands of a miscreant looking to steal your identity.  Negativity like this only breeds more negativity.  It’s a happiness riptide.  It will carry you away from shore, and if you don’t swim away it will pull you under.  The bottom line is that you can see the world through a lens of doubt and despair or hope and excitement.  It’s your choice.  Either way, you will someday arrive at the same destination.  The only question is: Do you want to arrive with a frown or a smile?

16. You’re letting loss devour you. – Sometimes you have to work at happiness.  Some hurdles in life are too difficult to clear simply by adopting a positive mindset.  Do you need to forgive someone?  Do you need to let go of a failed relationship?  Do you need to come to terms with the death of a loved one?  Life is full of loss.  But, in a sense, true happiness would not be possible without it.  It helps us appreciate the good times.  It helps us grow.  If you’re struggling to see the light, you’re not alone.  Find someone who understands and talk to them.  Reach out for support.  Don’t let loss devour you.  (Read Second Firsts.)

17. You avoid facing the truth. – The truth does not cease to exist when it is ignored.  You cannot find peace by avoiding things.  You have to feel it to heal it.  Bring your fears and weaknesses front and center and shine a blazing spotlight on them.  Because the only way out is through.  The pain of facing the truth is SO worth it in the long run, I swear.

18. You put off making decisions. – Bad decisions are almost always better than no decisions at all.  Indecisiveness just delays, while bad decisions teach us to yield better ones.  In the end, we most often regret the chances we didn’t take, the relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make.

YOUR TURN…

As you know, when we stop doing the wrong things and start doing the right things, life gets easier.  It just makes sense.  So how have you been making your life harder than it has to be?   What can you do today to simplify things?  Leave a comment below and let us know.

Credits: Written by Marc Chernoff of Marc and Angel Hack Life, where this was originally featured.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach, the author Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work and co-author of Selling for Geniuses as well as a motivational speaker on personal growth. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or Rick@CoachRickKolster.comwww.CoachRickKolster.com

THE BALD TRUTH - Personal Responsibilty

Personal Responsibility

“The devil made me do it.” How often do we hear this or a variation of this in today’s society? It may not even this blatant, but instead, may be more subtle. Let’s face it, we all make excuses for ourselves—excuses we would never make for other people. When I cut someone off in traffic, it was an honest mistake, but when someone else cuts me off in traffic, it is an affront to my honor right? Less and less often we are willing to take responsibility for our own actions, and it because easier and easier to blame something else or someone else for the things that we do.

It may have been a few years since you’ve last heard someone blame the devil for a choice they made. But you’ve probably seen those things replaced with other excuses. Remember hearing about the woman that sued McDonalds because she was so overweight from eating their food every day? Somehow, her choice to eat the food had become the restaurant’s fault. Of course, it’s not like McDonalds has any healthy options that she could have chosen, but it was still her choice to go to that restaurant, pick something off the menu, and then eat it. And yet, she blamed the fast food, not herself.

That’s not to say that all people are overweight because they eat fast food or even entirely because of choices that they make for themselves. But assigning blame, either to food or to genetics does not change reality and it does nothing to improve the situation. If you discover that you have a slow metabolism, one choice would be to blame that metabolism for causing you to gain weight. The other choice would be to take personal responsibility for things that you can control and learn to eat foods that will work with your metabolism.

This extends into every faction of society. Parents will blame other children or “the world” for the behavior of their children, when parents who take personal responsibility know full well that how children act is, largely, a result of how they are parented. As a society, we are refusing to act for ourselves, or refusing to acknowledge that the actions that we take have real consequences, especially if those consequences are negative. Instead, we choose to blame external forces for anything that goes wrong.

The good news is that taking personal responsibility is as easy as examining your actions and the consequences. Guess what, if you eat 3000 calories a day and do nothing but watch television, you will gain weight. If you ignore your children, they will probably throw a fit in public just to get some semblance of attention. Once we can take responsibility for the things that happen in our own lives, we can actually begin to change our mindset, our actions, and our entire lives. When we realize that we are in control, we can steer our lives towards something better.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach,  the author of the upcoming book Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as a public speaker on personal growth.. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or Rick@CoachRickKolster.com
www.CoachRickKolster.com

The BALD TRUTH - Life Balance

                                                       Life balance

How to find a balance in life?
Each of us has to follow a process of steps in life.  When children grow up, they must focus on education. Then, they should have a stable work so that they can earn a good salary each month. When they decide to get married, their attention should be directed towards finding the right partner.

We all know that we have to set some goals in order to achieve the best results. After setting goals, we then start planning the steps that we have to follow in order to reach what we want to get.

Determine your mindset
Let’s think that you are looking for a new job. You are the one that has to choose how things will happen. In many cases, people think that they cannot get positive results because of destiny. This is false. Every success requires effort.  Begin by thinking that you are excellent at what you doing. Recognize and point out positive aspects about yourself. Understand that success is hard. Achieving all you want is going to take effort on your part. Most of all you have to be very involved in the process without trying to skip any step.  Planning your daily duties helps you get the results you want.

Being balanced doesn’t mean that we have to have equal parts of everything in our life. You may need to let some things go. We are different, and sometimes things that can make you happy have a different impact on another person.  You should just try to find what is good for you and what makes you happy; Another important aspect. We, as human beings, all change. What made us happy yesterday, could make today upset. Why? Because we change our perspectives easily.

Life coaching
If you feel that you can’t function alone, please feel free to ask for help:  Find a coach.  Life coaches can help you see things you may be missing. Occasionally, Friends can provide you with pieces of advice.  However,    As well as you think you know yourself, you might be wrong. The more outside perspective you get from a qualified coach, the better prepared you will be for taking life in your own hands.

Purpose and direction
The life purpose that you have uncovered and discovered will guide you towards a sure destination: that one that you desire for yourself. Knowing your purpose is key. It is what it is whether you know it or not.   If you are very confident in your purpose you will keep headed the right way. Everything is based on living to your purpose. Be equilibrated and self-motivated and success will definitely appear on your street.

Success
After having overcome obstacles, you are now free to feel happy you have reached success. The key is that success can have different forms for every person. For instance, one could consider that he got the right way to the success by achieving great grades in school. Another one could reconsider success as a bonus for having done his job well.

Don’t forget: success can be reached. Be aware of your purpose, use your skills and take action on opportunities, this will get you on the path to success. Start thinking positive. That’s the first thing that you have to do.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is a certified business/life coach,  the author of the upcoming book Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work as well as a public speaker on personal growth.. He can be contacted at 817-748-7425 or Rick@CoachRickKolster.com www.CoachRickKolster.com

The BALD TRUTH - April Fools!

Our minds cannot distinguish between what is real or what is made up.  We spend much of our time telling ourselves what we believe is real.  Sometimes we spend much of our time living a MSU life. That is a world of Making Stuff Up. We fool ourselves all the time.  It's how we are wired.  We see something and come to a conclusion based on our own experiences.  Many times, our experiences taint our thoughts and we make up what we believe to be true. It’s like the ultimate April Fool’s joke except we do it every day!

Think about it.  You are driving down the road, it is just starting to get dark, but it is still clear out. You are a little behind (as usual) and pushing the speed limit just a little bit.  You are cruising along and all of a sudden you see a car coming up on you from behind and then the blue and red lights pop on and it starts to speed up and gain ground on you.  At that instant what is happening to your mind, what are you thinking?  Probably, crap, I'm going to get a ticket.  Now take an inventory on how your body is reacting.  Is your blood pressure up? Is your stomach in a knot?  Are you sweating?

Answer... YES!!  Your brain is telling you that you are getting pulled over and probably going to get a speeding ticket.  Back to real time... While all that is going on the police car is gaining on you and comes up behind you, then suddenly swerves into the left hand lane and blows right by lights and siren blaring. WHEW!!! That was close.

Now think about it. were you really getting pulled over?  NO! did you think you were? YES! did you react physiologically as if you were getting pulled over?  YES!  Why?  Because your brain knows only what we tell it.  We decide what is real.  So how can this help you be more positive?

Easy. tell yourself good things, things that will empower you. Things that will make you believe good will happen. You will get that deal, you will win that game, you will love stronger and deeper, you can get that promotion. 

Intention is so powerful. If you watch the video you will see how Jessica tells herself she loves everything about her life. http://youtu.be/qR3rK0kZFkg 
  

She is happy, she is positive and she is looking at the good she has rather than the things she doesn't.  What would change for you if you focused on the good in your life? The great things you do have rather than what is missing and is crappy?  Tell yourself it will all work out for the best and I guarantee it will turn out much better than if you whine about it,  AND the people around you will thank you too.

Quit playing your daily April Fool’s joke on yourself and start thing positive and see what happens.

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is the founder of the Peak Performance Group. He speaks The BALD TRUTH and works with leaders to “Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work!” 

Order his new book "Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work" here: www.rollupyoursleevesbook.com

The BALD TRUTH - 10 behaviors that create trust

Re-posted from http://buschmanconsultancy.com/en/2014/02/28/10-behaviours-that-create-trust/#.UydNNl5lB-Q.blogger

  Stephen M.R. Covey states that the most important ingredient within any relationship is trust. Not just in loving relationships but also in working relationships. In an age where change is occurring at ever-increasing speed, and commitment from employees and line managers is increasingly crucial, the value of trust is greater than ever. According to Covey, it is the most important and most underrated ingredient for business success.

In the article The speed of trust, I describe four key elements of trust: intention, integrity, capabilities and results. In this article I will go in more detail into 10 behaviours that help to create trust. I’ll be interested to know how far you are aware of these already and whether you are applying them in your own life.

1. Straight talk
Did you know that 6 out of 10 employees do not trust their line manager? This is often due to a lack of transparency – partly because the line managers will not admit to making mistakes. Or because they do not treat bad news within their organisation in an open manner. I have some good news: there is an alternative! By being honest, telling it like it is, getting to the point and using simple language.

2. Listen first
Have you ever asked yourself what would happen if, instead of broadcasting your own message, you were to ask questions and listen to the answers? If you replaced the monologue with a dialogue? If you honestly want to understand opinions and insights that deviate from your own? If you are capable of doing this, you will be operating at the third level of conversation: the dialogue, as described in my article the conversation.

3. Demonstrate respect
Demonstrating respect means that you accept the other as a worthwhile and valuable person. And you view that person separately from their function within the organisation. It doesn’t make any difference whether someone is a manager or a cleaner, everyone contributes to the success of an organisation. Demonstrating respect is often expressed in the small stuff; looking a person in the eye, saying thank you, holding the door open for someone, or addressing someone by their first name. And, sometimes it’s not happening that way. Check out this video to see a different perspective and the impact it can have.

4. Show loyalty

If someone has produced an outstanding achievement, do you acknowledge the good job they’ve done? Or do you take the credit yourself? I hope you answered with the first option! Be sincere, support your people and be proud of them. Make your support known to them and others. If you have to talk about people in a negative way, then do this in their presence.

5. Keep commitments
People often say that agreed is agreed, but to what extent is this carried out in practice? When it comes to simple issues it’s not normally a problem. It’s the more complex or politically sensitive matters that create difficulties. So try to be honest and transparent in these situations too. And if you know beforehand that you won’t be able to keep your promise, or if this becomes clear to you later on, just admit it.

6. Be willing to improve
Are you the kind of person who wants to learn all the time? Who dares to take risks, asks for feedback and learns from their mistakes? By adopting this attitude, you will not only continue learning throughout your life, but you are also an example to others to do the same. And this is a wonderful foundation for making your team consistently more effective.

7. Confront reality
We all experience difficult periods in our lives. The question is: how do you deal with them? Do you evade the issue and put off doing things you know you should, or do you tackle the difficult issues straight away? Don’t bury your head in the sand, but express what you’re having problems with, ask for help and start resolving the situation.

8. Clarify expectations
What do you expect from your employees? Make clearly defined agreements about the ‘what’ and the ‘how’. If you are expressing your expectations, make sure to check that the other party has understood what you are saying and that they are aware of how they can help you fulfill them. Try to be as concrete as possible. In other words, make your expectations, or goals, SMART: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic and Timely.

9. Create transparency
Just be open and honest. Speak the truth and try not to appear better than you are. If for example you failed to do something, try not to think up a clever excuse to make you feel better. Just admit the real reason you didn’t keep to your agreement. And don’t forget: a half-truth is also a lie.

10. Righting wrongs
If you’ve made a mistake, then take responsibility for it. And try to find out how you can put it right. Don’t wait too long, but see what you can do and do it at once. And don’t forget to say ‘Sorry’, and mean it. This might be tricky, but if you’re able to push your ego to one side, it will pay dividends.

I wish you many relationships full of trust!

That's The BALD TRUTH!

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is the founder of the Peak Performance Group. He speaks to organizations and associations on The BALD TRUTH He also works with leaders to “Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work!” 

Pre-order his new book "Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work" here: www.rollupyoursleevesbook.com 
www.plus.google.com/CoachRickKolsterCBC 

Reprinted from:  10 behaviours that create trust - Buschman Consultancy

The BALD TRUTH - Living in the Present

I've discovered that I have greater success with living life in the present moment when I remove judgment from what I'm experiencing. Rather than making an event a bad or a good experience, I find myself being in the "isness" of the moment; that is, what I'm feeling is much more helpful than why it isn't what I think it should be. This is called allowing rather than resisting what is. Even if I wish to change the moment, it's far more useful to allow it without any judgment and then notice everything I can about it.

The more I stay out of my good-thought/bad-thought routine, the more I'm able to just be with it. I love to observe the instant without any judgment. Birds simply allow whatever comes their way, no matter if the wind picks up or the rain comes, and I work at being like one of those fabulous creatures. The way I do so is to ask myself this question: "What's happening right here and right now, independent of my opinion about it?" Then I notice all that I can take in-the sky, the wind, the sounds, the light, the insects, the temperature, the people, the judgments...everything. I stay free of opinions and just let myself be. In these moments, I don't need an excuse or an explanation for anything.

I try to keep in mind that whenever I react against any form that life takes in the present moment, I'm treating the now as some kind of impediment or even as my enemy.

Be without judgment and you'll never feel the need for some tiresome excuse to use up your precious seconds, such as "I'm too old" or "It will take a long time" or "It will be too difficult." Instead, you'll be in the now, welcoming your constant present-moment companion, your Source of being, which knows nothing of excuses and doesn't know how to be anyplace but here, now. As one of my spiritual predecessors, Dale Carnegie, once wrote: "One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon-instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today."

Become one in the present moment with all of the roses that show up in your life. Stay present: every second, every minute, and every hour. Every day of your life is full of present moments of infinite value. You won't find God yesterday or tomorrow-your Source is always only here, now.  From Positive thoughts email.

Live well then Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work!

Coach Rick www.CoachRickKolster.com

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is the founder of the Peak Performance Group. He speaks The BALD TRUTH and works with leaders to “Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work!” 

Pre-order his new book "Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work" here: www.rollupyoursleevesbook.com 
www.plus.google.com/CoachRickKolsterCBC

The BALD TRUTH - Breaking Out Of Your Comfort Zone

I am finally stepping out of my personal comfort zone and hiring a personal trainer at my gym. Now keep in mind that over the past 35 years, I have been a collegiate level athlete in two sports, competed in over 40 triathlons, finished the Body for Life challenge 2 times and spent a lot of time in the gym (gym rat) for most of my adolescent and adult life.What could a young trainer teach ME about working out?

 Let me tell you, A lot! The reason I'm hiring a trainer is that I feel like I have hit a plateau in my workouts. I have my old routines and they are keeping me in pretty good shape. In fact I will say that at almost 55 years old I'm probably in better shape than most 25 year olds. I needed to try something different to help me break through and all I needed was a different perspective that would allow me to hit the next level.

If you have hit a plateau in your sales or management career, your personal life or just feel flat. You may be successful and accomplished much in your life. Outwardly have what most would say is success. Are you where YOU want to be? Could it be you are doing the same things that got you here again and again? Is now the time to hire someone to help you move to the next level.

I will keep you posted on how the training is going. I pretty sure that after even only a few sessions I will see (and feel) the difference. Make the change you need to get to where you want to get. 

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is the founder of the Peak Performance Group. He speaks The BALD TRUTH and works with leaders to “Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work!” 

Pre-order his new book "Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work" here: www.rollupyoursleevesbook.com 

www.plus.google.com/CoachRickKolsterCBC  

The BALD TRUTH - Moving Forward with Power & Confidence

 This weekend I was blessed to spend it with friends and family. Watching a loving family interact at a wonderful event like a wedding was just inspiring. To see the love that each had for the other. Brothers, sister, fathers, mothers, cousin and friends all together in a spirit of love and support for one another. Too often we get mired down in our own little world to really experience that blessings we have right in front of us. So why don't we do this all the time?

The thought I have today is this: How do you move forward in your life after experiencing difficulty, pain, loss or hurt? What can you do to help yourself move forward?

First thing is to accept it. That's right accept it. It happened, its over with now accept it and know there is nothing you can or are going to do to change it. As I just love to say... "It is what it is".

Next we have just got to get over it. Why? Because again, nothing we can do about the past. We can only control our future. Are you going to relive those hurts, pains, disappointments over and over again? Why put yourself through that? Self flagellation hurts!

Finally decide what you want for your future. What does tomorrow look like? Is it a day you want to live in? What good can you put into the day, the week, the month? Decide what you want your life to look like and make life give it to you. Do you have some goals for the week? How about the day? I wake every morning and try to sit on my patio and pray, look at what yesterday was like. I figure what was good yesterday and what I want to change for today. Journal... This allows you to get out all the junk. We all have it, that junk in the trunk of our mind.

Are you setting daily objectives for your self? Too often we set BHAG's. We set those BIG HAIRY AUDACIOUS GOALS for our self but neglect to look at what we have to do today. One step into the future. The next action, then the next, then the next... Planning is a dirty word to so many yet so many fail to plan. While we fail to plan I really don't think anyone plans to fail.

Are you setting your daily direction? If not, why not? Do you need help and accountability? Get it!

Live your life with passion and a clear direction.

That's The BALD TRUTH!

Coach Rick Kolster, CBC is the founder of the Peak Performance Group. He speaks The BALD TRUTH and works with leaders to “Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work!” 

Pre-order his new book "Roll Up Your Sleeves and Get To Work" here: www.rollupyoursleevesbook.com 
www.plus.google.com/CoachRickKolsterCBC